Category Archives: bizarre

Company name of the day

Josh found today’s most awesome company name:

Picture 13.jpg

Interesting searches

Oranchak.com’s web logs have interesting info on what search terms people are using in Google and other search engines to get to my site. Last month somebody browsed to my site by searching for this text:

what does a smudge on a window on a skyscrapper mean

Makes me wonder what was going through this person’s mind as he stared at the window smudge with a puzzled look on his face. “Is it a sign? Is somebody trying to contact me? Perhaps it is a message from the FUTURE!”

There are also a surprising number of searches for “sea monster”. I did not know my site was a reference point for such things. And for some reason I get a lot of searches for “i want to be a hulkamaniac”. That phrase very dependably continues to appear in the logs.

Other noteworthy search phrases:

not the smartest peanut in the turd

i get red splotches on my chest and back after showers

But Clint by far wins the award for the most bizarre search phrase used to get to a personal blog.

Bring me her brains!

Followup to the previous post

I made some more animations of Carolyn’s MRI scans, and Clint expertly strung them together and set them to music!

Watch the video above, or click this YouTube link

Collectibles market

Noteworthy news from Frank:

A spam I just got had the subject “herpes autograph”.

I don’t know what those spammers are trying to sell, but, man, that’d make an AWESOME band name.

Now is the time on Sprockets when we X-Ray your luggage

monkeyThe absolute best words to come out of airport security officials are related to “monkey helper” guidelines posted at the bottom of this Transportation Security Administration page:

“TSOs have been trained to not touch the monkey during the screening process.”

Dieter would be offended. “Vould you like to touch my monkey? Touch him! Love him! Liebe meine abst-monkey.”

Thanks to jwz for the find.

Incidentally, why is it that the only items under the “makeup and personal items” category on this page that are disallowed from checked luggage are “lip gels such as Carmex or Blistex”? Every other cosmetic item is allowed on checked luggage besides Blistex! What is so special about lip ointment??

lipporist

So it’s OK to check knives and not Blistex? Say what????

He nice, the Borat.

I had no idea Borat was in town! He came to a rodeo in Salem last year to piss off the crowd, and the scene has made it into the new Borat movie. You can see parts of the scene in the new theatrical trailer for the movie.

Rodeo in Salem gets unexpected song rendition

“I hope you kill every man, woman and child in Iraq, down to the lizards,” he said, according to Brett Sharp of Star Country WSLC, who was also on stage that night as a media sponsor of the rodeo.

An uneasy murmur ran through the crowd.

“And may George W. Bush drink the blood of every man, woman and child in Iraq,” he continued, according to Robynn Jaymes, who co-hosts a morning radio show with Sharp and was also among the stunned observers.

The crowd’s reaction was loud enough for John Saunders, the civic center’s assistant director, to hear from the front office. “It was a restless kind of booing,” Saunders said.

Full story

The Filthy Mind Detector

From the instruction manual of the Play-Doh Creativity Table we got for Iris for her birthday:

fuzzy pumper

You coppers can’t keep me locked up forever, see? Myeah! Myeah!

Our friends Jon and Kate tried to take their son Iain to the Mill Mountain zoo yesterday, but were asked to leave the mountain because this happened:

A Japanese monkey aptly named Oops bolted from the Roanoke city zoo, sparking a park-wide shutdown as staff searched the surrounding forest where they could hear her in the trees.

Full article.

Scamming for Christ

I received one of these “Jesus Prayer Rug” scam letters in the mail a few weeks back:

jesus-rug-5-medium.jpg

The Jesus Prayer Rug is a sheet of paper you unfold after opening the letter. The caption says: “Look into Jesus’ Eyes you will see they are closed. But as you continue to look you will see His eyes opening and looking back into your eyes. Then go home and be alone and kneel on this Rug of Faith or touch it to both knees. Then please check your needs on our letter to you. Please return this Prayer Rug. Do not keep it.” Alas, the optical illusion did not inspire me to kneel upon a piece of paper I received in the mail. I feel really bad for people that fall for this trick, and it annoys me that the originators of this letter are trying to trick these folks. Naturally, in the list of needs on the back of the letter, there is an option for enclosing a “seed gift” of money to help the “church”.

(UPDATE: higher resolution versions of the Jesus Rug. Can you see his eyes opening? First | Second)

jesus-rug-1.jpg

This is the message on the back of the “rug”. Soaked with the power of prayer? Maybe I should not have touched it. Sounds vaguely unsanitary.

jesus-rug-3-medium.jpg

Just like emailed chain letters, this one also claims to make you rich as long as you pass it along to others.

jesus-rug-4-medium.jpg

Even more of the ridiculous claims. You can read more about the scam on this informative post.

A cry for help

While looking for pizza places in the phone book at the Outer Banks beach house last week, we found this:

alcohaaaal.jpg

The help line is apparently named after the sound you make when you’ve had too much alcohaaaaaal. I also like the wording: “24 Hour Abuse Access”. For those odd hours when you just gotta have some abuse.

Interestingly, a Google search yields many listings with this misspelling.