Category Archives: bizarre

The animals shall have their revenge

I’ve had nothing interesting to post recently. The best I can offer at the moment is this strange statute I found in the LAW table of the Kentucky state legal case management system we’ve been working on:

ACQUIRING CONTROL OVER ANIMAL FACILITY W/O CONSENT

Interestingly, it is only a misdemeanor. And I’m not sure what the advantage is to gaining control of an animal facility. It doesn’t have nearly the same appeal as train robbing. Stealing a train FULL of animals, on the other hand… maybe THAT’S a felony.

Another interesting related statute:

REFUSAL TO LEAVE ANIMAL FACILITY

“Seriously; get OUT already! NO; FOR THE LAST TIME — YOU CAN’T HAVE A PUPPY!!!”

Convergence of important social issues

The hilarious headlines keep on coming. Kathryn found this one today:

It makes me wonder… if more people practiced birth control, would there be less cockfighting?

Article.

Gluten-free time capsule

I have always suspected that there is something peculiar about the construction of the foul-tasting energy bars Kathryn is fond of buying:

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Lasting for one thousand years is an admirable feat. But I don’t think that will improve the flavor.

(My guess is it’s supposed to mean “May 30, 2007”.)

The Demon’s Paintbrush

Sweet Lord, my Genetic Algorithms course has ended. The giant pile of work is now behind me. I have to say that despite the large amount of work, the course has been one of the most rewarding in recent memory. There are a lot of exciting ideas in this field. The course instructor is David E. Goldberg, who is an influential luminary in the field.

For the course project, I decided to return to my decades-old interest in graphics programming by developing a genetic artwork program. The basic idea was to “breed” new images by figuring out which images in a random population are better than others. I needed a way to rank which images were better than others. Inspired by Flickr’s concept of interestingness, I decided to use color comparisons to popular images from Flickr.com as a way to rank images. An image that has a close match in color to a popular or interesting Flickr image is given a high rank. The genetic algorithm runs over successive generations to produce images with higher ranking. Eventually I got a lot of good results, and then a scary demon appeared:

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The picture on the left is the Flickr image that the generated images resembled most. Lower numbers mean higher rankings. Look at 392. The demon got 4th place! Maybe that’s why he looks angry.

Here are some other interesting results I got with the demon’s paintbrush. Click to get to a more detailed writeup, including the many thousands of generated results:

UPDATE: Click here to see some giant tiled montages of artwork generated by the technique.

Doesn’t everyone need a deal like this?

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Go buy it, and re-sell it at the list price!!

Drywall face

QVC has some kind of strange hook that baits us into watching. Flipping through the channels, we are compelled to have the surreal experience of watching tacky products sold by over-enthusiastic cable television personalities. Kathryn was ensnared recently by the hyperactive delivery of sales points for Laura Geller “Spackle” makeup:

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I don’t claim to understand women, but I doubt they find much attraction to a cosmetic product named after something sold at Home Depot to help you patch up drywall so you can get your security deposit back.

Offensive virtual festive gourds

I upgraded my Mac text editor today and saw the following surprising entry in the release notes:

[REMOVED] TextMate no longer pays tribute to human sacrifices, rape, nor does it show a picture of the God of the deaths in your dock — ticket 945BEB5D

Normally I’d expect to see a list of bug fixes or new features. The above entry surprised me, and I had to find out why it was there. It all spawned from the company deciding to push out a Halloween-oriented theme for the software. The theme included this dock icon:

pumpkin

Inevitably, someone found it offensive, and their complaint caused it to be removed: “I found this offensive and promptly removed the theme. Please understand I do not think it is offensive because I am some fanatical weirdo. But the roots of Halloween are in animal and human sacrifices as well as rape in the name if Satan.”

Here’s the full story with more detail. I can only imagine what will happen if they push out any Christmas-oriented imagery in their December updates.

Cthulhu fhtagn, and he approves of this message.

The unspeakable dread is mounting on this Election Day as I traverse the glittering touchscreen prompts on the voting machines to select our next round of overlords. But in his house at R'lyeh, dead Cthulhu waits dreaming. And he has a campaign. Chris, friend of the Cthulhu for Senate effort, wore this shirt to the polls this morning:

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Get the word out with another fine example of Cthulhu campaign paraphenilia:

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More info on Cthulhu. Keep his name in mind if your desperation at the ballot leads you to stare at the write-in box, wondering what name to scrawl there. Is “a pulpy, tentacled head surmounted by a grotesque and scaly body with rudimentary wings” really any worse than many of the people we’ve already elected???

We’ll have to wait a little while longer for the Cthulhu for President campaign to heat up.

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The Napoleon Dynamite shirt the Cthulhu shirt is based on:

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See also: Icethulhu and Foodthulhu.

Lindsay Lohan vs Maria Montessori

Sometimes, free web site hosting is not the best option. Often, you will get stuck with garish banner ads plastered across your web site so the hosting provider can generate a few cents of revenue from your page. The Montessori school we send Iris to uses one of these free web hosting providers, and here is an exhibit of why this can be a bad idea:

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Click for a larger picture. Notice the banner ad on the right.

Showing cleavage and asking “whose clothes are more revealing?” may not be the best way to promote your preschool. Or am I just being old fashioned?

“Get with it, Dave; breasts sell EVERYTHING, including preschools. END OF STORY.”

Wifi at the Rat’s Mouth

Dad and I are here in Boca Raton, after an 11 hour drive, camped out at an almost shoddy Quality Inn, visiting family. Things are falling apart at the hotel. Lights are out, cables are loose, switchplate covers popping off at the slightest touch. The smiling Haitian woman at the front desk cheerfully hands my Dad some replacement light bulbs with a heavily accented “here you go”, and I sniff around for wireless networks around the hotel:

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The last one in the list catches my eye. I look over at Dad, as if to answer the question.